Secret of NIMH Riffs

Some of you may or may not be familiar with this site-

www.rifftrax.com[]www.rifftrax.com

Here can you purchase MP3s of Mike Nelson and other MST3k alumni making fun of movies currently availble on DVD.

They have an iRiff feature, where fans can make and sell their own riffs.

Well, recently I've been toying with the idea of making an iRiff of The Secret of NIMH. I already have a few ideas of what go in it.

Movie - Cynthia: Mommy, is Timmy gonna die?

Riff - Can I have his stereo?

Movie - Mrs. Brisby enters the Council Chamber.

Riff - Don't mind the cosumtes. We're just in the middle of a Rennaisance Faire right now.

Movie - Montage of animals in lab cages.

Riff - Oh! Those evil, evil scientists! Experimenting on a small handfull of animals just so they can save countless human lives. For shame! For shame!

Movie - Cynthia: What's that black stuff?

Riff - The toilet's backing up again.

I'm not sure if I'll actually go through with this idea just yet. But if anyone can suggest some other Riffs, I'd really appreciate it.

I'm know very much about rifftrax, being a fan of Mystery Science Theater 3000 for many years. Those riffs were very funny :D

I am also familiar with rifftrax. But I have only seen parts of MST3K, unfortunately. Still, great idea.

Movie - Jeremy: You didn't scare me. I was just, ah, exercising, you see.

Riff - Yeah. Haven't you heard of the new Yoga style?

Jenner: Nicodemus would have us destroy this colony only to lead us to starvation in some wilderness.
Riff: Plus he's trying to get us to update to Windows Vista!

Jenner: We were just talking about you.
Justin: That's refreshing Jenner, you'll usually screaming about us.
Riff: Threatening us, calling us in the middle of the night and then hanging up, carving satanic symbols and messages on our doors, poisoning our meals, casting voodoo curses on us and generally being very rude.

Mr. Ages: Confounded machine. You never know when it's gonna up and blow.
Riff: I can't imagine his insurance rates.

Here's NIMH 2 riffs

Opening title screen
Riff: NIMH 2 was created on a state-of-the-art Sega CD console

Timmy: I failed you dad.
Riff: You're damn right you failed me! Why can't you be like your brother? I know he's evil but look at how much he's accomplished.

Timmy: I'm tired of standing guard.
Riff: Isn't that what Lincoln's bodyguard said?

Timmy: Dad wasn't crazy!
Riff: He was smart enough to stay away from this film.

NIMH is on fire. Timmy is carrying Martin
Riff: Quick! Let's find a refrigerator! I saw Indiana Jones do it.

After the opening prologue
Riff: The film garnered much acclaim and a cult status. Years later a MGM executive stumbled upon the film in the archives. After a meeting with the companies top lawyers and accountants, a plan for a sequel was put into the works. They search low and high, mostly low, for the best writer suited for the job. They found a writer one day working at the McDonalds off Sunset Blvd. After acquiring a small fee and crystal meth the writer started the screenplay. It was finished the next day.
Then the producers set out to find the best actors the industry has to offer. They found only 3. The rest were found waiting in the unemployment line.
Production began and was completed within a month.
And now, that film...

NIMH 2 End Credits
Riff: Timothy's hero status didn't last long. During a scouting expedition, he failed to follow orders resulting in the death of Justin and Brutus. He was charged and tried in court. He was hung for his incompetence.
Martin developed a drug problem and is currently in rehab.
Mrs. Brisby changed her name to avoid being in a sequel. Whereabouts unknown.
Jeremy was killed during a pheasant shoot.
Cecil was crushed.
Dr. Valentine burned to death in the NIMH fire.
Teresa hosts a Mexican game show
Cynthia appears on infomercials
The writer, director and producers were tried by the public for crimes against humanity. They were tried in court for the City and County of Los Angeles. And now, the results of that trial...

They arrive at NIMH
Riff: Mr. Cheney, you home?
Riff: Its the factory belonging to Willa Wonka's evil twin brother.

"Timmy to the Rescue", in my opinion, is one of those movies that's so bad that not even a RiffTrax can make it enjoyable. That being said...

Film - Narrrator: The prophet Nicodemus foretold that one day a son of Jonathan Brisby would save the Rats when NIMH returned...

Riff - No I didn't!

Not sure where this goes for NIMH 2, but here goes.

Riff1: Lost 6? Okay that's 6 and 2 and...hey wait a second. That's 8 mice total, just like in the book. There were 11 mice that were injected in the first movie.

Riff2: I guess the missing three were those that were smart enough to not be associated with the sequel.

Jeremy is flying down towards NIMH which looks like a green glowing blob.
Jeremy: What's that?
Riff: Its the everlasting gobstopper.

Ages: What have I taught you?
Timmy: That men can wear the same underwear up to 3 days?
Ages: That's just between you and me.
Riff: There goes my childhood, thanks movie.

Justin: Welcome young Master Brisby.
Riff: Justin, agent for NAMBLA.
Riff #2: Somewhere Peter Strauss is crying.
Riff #3: I think all of humanity is crying.

Justin takes out a key from a box and hands it to Timmy
Riff: I guess they forgot about the amulet.

Justin: You have to prepare mentally and (swings across a stream) PHYSICALLY!
Riff: Let the force flow through you.

Scene where Timmy arrives in Thorn Valley
Riff: I thought Redwall was demeaning to rats.